Sunday, June 28, 2009

Show and Tell


by Aliza Davidovit

As the black-haired beauty with an hour-glass figure walked down Madison Avenue, her long hair bounced against her shoulders and her designer handbag was swinging rhythmically back and forth by its long chain. If I were a man I’d probably say she was the finest thing I’d ever seen, but I’m not, and thus I took much greater interest in her gorgeous handbag. I stopped her to ask her where she got it. She laughed saying it was a knock-off and it cost her $20.

I was new to New York then—I didn’t understand that things of value such as Chanels and Guccis, Louis Vittons and Dolce Gabbanas could be imitated so cheaply. Just slap on a label and you could saunter down Madison Avenue with the best of them. But the concept slapped me on the head like an old woman pummeling a mugger with her lead-laden purse. People don’t care about the truth or the substance, they care about the show. Ouch! It was a harsh welcome to New York.

I deemed it then, as now, a fraudulent fashion faux pas that led me to much profounder questions about life. Those imitation handbags have since reminded me of swine and distinctly why pigs from all other non-kosher animals are the most vilified. The reason being that a pig has exterior features which suggest it’s a kosher animal—it has split hooves-- but it has internal qualities which make it intrinsically not so. Yet this duplicitous show-and-tell of our “external things,” I believe is the underlying cause for so much of our unhappiness today.
Materialistic things have come to define us and confine us, but they hardly refine us.

I guess it bothered me deeply because it was a strong symbolic shout out that we are all on a constant treadmill of lies, each trying to impress the other with B.S. And if we do serve to impress another with our “phony’ external trappings, titles, glitter, no matter what, on the inside we know the truth between what we show and what we truly are. And it is in that gap between “showing” and “knowing” where our better nature rots.

If today’s financial bust has taught us anything, it is to start being happy with less. Much of the crisis has come from people, governments and financial institutions living beyond their means and incurring unsustainable debt. Happiness was defined for so long as “more.” Yet, interestingly, surveys have shown that even as Americans grew richer over a 30-year period, there was no positive correlation with happiness.

It’s fascinating that not too long ago, before the economic collapse, bling was the thing-- it was fashionable for people to flaunt their possessions, wealth and success. Today, it is taboo. The new rage is for people to cry poverty in unison and commiserate how much they lost with Madoff or the market. Understated is the new flashy.

So what happens now? Can we no longer be happy because we are curtailed from showing off? Or perhaps now is the perfect time to reassess what happiness really means, authentically! We should seek happiness that is not manufactured in China or Italy, but rather from within by being kind, doing good, elevating the world, serving G-d and our better natures, and opening those handbags, designer or not, in meaningful and charitable ways. “You can stop trying to keep up with the Joneses. I’ve heard they’ve died of exhaustion.” (anonymous)

2 comments:

  1. Aliza, we have become a society of excesses. Though we are not the only society to become this way in world history, it has just become more pervasive throughout all of the classes. It seems to stem from our lack of faith and confidence of who and what we are. We continue to externalize who and what we want to be. We seem to be in the "hey look how beautiful I am and how much I have" mode. It permeates throughout are society and is constantly broadcast in our everyday lives. Money and the appearance of money is the God many of us worship. We will bow at the alter of the golden calf in order to get to fulfill our wants and desires. We see it everywhere, especially in our politicians and this we have come to expect. We also see it in our religious institutions. We have mega churches and temples that reek of excess. They continue to flaunt their wealth by increasing the material condiments that they use to keep and attract worshipers, thus increasing their wealth. These excesses are part of that alter of materialism that many of us worship. Don't get me wrong, I am a strong capitalist, but I think we should have a moral obligation to ourselves to keep this in perspective and be true to our selves.

    Sorry for the ranting, I was getting carried away.

    Take care.

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  2. WOW, I made a few grammatical errors. I guess that is what happens when you are in a hurry.

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